On the Cruise of Love...

That title won't be funny to you unless you know the story of how I was scammed into being in a cheesy play (called the Cruise of Love) at a local theater play in high school. 

Last formal night

This is the last post about the cruise! I am sure you all are sick of it by now, but I am really sad that I don't have an excuse to look at my pictures every day.  I also can't believe that we have been back for nearly 2 months. Where has the time gone?

There really weren't any blog worthy events that happened the last few days of the cruise.  The last day on ship was SUPER windy and cold. I was really angry because I wanted one more good laying out day!  I tried to lay out there and would just cover my body from my chest to my thighs with a towel to try to stay warm, but it just wasn't working out.  Goosebumps + Laying out = no good.

This was our server, Iis. She was SO nice.  On one of the nights, she was telling us about her family.  She is a single mother who's ex-husband had a gambling problem.  She was so in debt that she had to  leave her 3 young kids behind so she could work and make money for them. When she was telling us this,  I totally started bawling.  I tried so hard not to cry because I obviously didn't want to upset her. It was so sad and really made me appreciate the good life that I have!

On some of the last nights on the ship, they started having karaoke contests to be in a big show.  My parents and Jordan kept bugging me about it (like seriously asked me no less than 25 times to PLEASE go try out) and every time, I would just say no.  My dad said that the winner of the final competition won a cruise, but I still didn't want to try out.  After the first night, I was pretty stern and said that I had absolutely no desire to get up there and sing in front of everyone.  So the second night we went again and they didn't let up. Finally, I told them very sternly NO, I wasn't going to go and try out!  Then everyone shut up.  Soon after, they announced that they were going to be holding the auditions for Britney Spears.  No one said anything to me and no one was really going up to try out.  The guilt got to me (and maybe the thought of winning a cruise was slightly appealing), so I dragged Aubrey up there to try out with me/make a fool of ourselves.  There were 5 girls total (including Aubrey and I) and everyone took turns singing "Hit Me Baby One More Time". I was 5th to go, but then the song ended and I didn't get to try out.  I was thinking, "yes! I'm free" and I told everyone it was fine, I didn't have to try out.  But of course we just had to sing another song.  So I was first, sang approximately 15 seconds of "Oops I did it again" and then the mic got passed and everyone sang like a minute each for the rest of the song.  So then came the voting.  I figured since I had hardly sang, I was not going to win, but somehow, I got the most cheers and I won.  Some of the girls I guess really wanted it because they walked away looking pretty angry.  I think I might have crushed their dreams!

So then for the next day and a half, I had to listen to an mp3 player with my song on it, get it all memorized, go to rehearsals, get my costuming, etc.  I was actually really worried that they were going to have some skank costume and that I was going to have to explain that I couldn't wear it, etc.   Lucky for me, it actually turned out to be a blonde wig with pigtails, plaid skirt that was way too large around the waist and went down to like mid calf and an oversized men's shirt.... sexy!

So I seriously had to perform in the last show and had my very own backup dancers. I felt SO awkward up there because for one, the lights were so bright and I couldn't  see anything, two I couldn't hear myself singing and three, I couldn't move from my little X on the floor since I had backup dancers dancing around me.  Since I had heard nothing about the prize, I figured it wasn't really true.  And sure enough, it wasn't... I just won a DVD of the performance and a cast picture.  Score.

See? Awkward.  I am so NOT a performer.

My "mentor" that I had to shadow through the rehearsals and show.

And no, I will not be posting the DVD anywhere!  Jordan likes to show it to anyone that will watch, so I plan to go ahead and hide that for the next 15+ years.

So that's it!  You are all kind of upset that you didn't book the cruise when I told you to, aren't you?

Cabo San Lucas

Cabo really is so beautiful... so I have about 500 thousand pictures of this port.  I really wish that we had more time here. I always refer to it as a half port since we had to be back on the boat by about 2 pm.  Since I didn't want to get up at the crack of dawn, we only had about 4 hours to enjoy - so our options were kind of limited.  My parents usually hit up the main beach, but right when we got off the boat, we were offered a cheap boat tour (and they threw in free beer - SCORE! just kidding), so we decided to see the sights that Cabo had to offer. 

When we pulled out of the dock, the driver all of the sudden stopped the boat, ran to the back and made everyone put life jackets on.  I think it was because the coast guard or whatever was driving right past, and it must be illegal to ride without everyone wearing life jackets.  Sizes didn't matter, clearly.  I am sure my dad would have been just fine with that life jacket should he have needed it...

The famous arch

Sea lions

Scary cave. I was kind of curious to see what lived in there... but not THAT curious.

The whole group

Lover's Beach

What? I said it was called Lover's Beach!  This picture would have been a lot better without all of those people in the background

I am fairly certain that this is my first time actually swimming in the ocean.  Do I look like I am about to drown? I probably am. I'm the world's worst swimmer (notice the doggy paddle).  But how COOL is that water?  It's amazing.

Riding back from the tour. Sweet hair, huh?

Awwww, cute.

These human gold statues are pretty common for Cabo. My mom wanted her picture taken with this guy, so she paid her buck.  When he was wrapping that hook around her neck, he totally poked her in the face.  It was funny to hear his little Mexican accent (since he is supposed to be Jack Sparrow) say , "sorry!".  I think he felt pretty bad.

Does that not look so miserable in the 90 degree heat?  I loved when people didn't know he was real and then he would move and they would FREAK OUT.

When we were riding back on our tender boats, this little guy decided to swim right next to us.  He was so cute bobbing up and down in the water.

And finally, we will end with some pics from the boat.  I could have sat there all day just enjoying the view. It is gorgeous.

Mazatlan

This stop seems so much more boring than the Puerto Vallarta stop, but after such a high energy day before, it's exactly what we needed!  We did a replay of the last time we were in Mazatlan  and got dropped off at the golden coast.  We found a great resort to chill at. I don't know why they just let people who aren't staying at the resort chill on their chairs/use their pool, but we had no problem with it.  The chairs we had were raised above the beach overlooking the ocean with a beautiful pool in the background.

I liked being raised above the beach because then the vendors couldn't come directly up to you, they just had to stay below you. It was a lot easier to say no to getting my hair braided/wooden statues/temporary tattoos, etc that way!

Jordan wanted to go jet skiing since I swam with the dolphins the day before, so we rented a jet ski and had fun playing in the ocean for a half hour

The jet ski was kind of ghetto, so we had to keep the throttle going or the engine would die.  It was definitely an adventure trying to switch drivers in the middle of the ocean!  Since we couldn't go very far, we got kind of sick of going back and forth along the beach, so we ended up coming back 5 minutes earlier than we had to. 

At the resort, they had a fun, little water slide that my mom and I went down about 10 times.  If you didn't get the hint from my last post, I love water slides!

I jokingly told my  mom to go down the water slide because I didn't think that she would (she rarely gets her hair wet), but sure enough, she got up and did it.

And no trip to Mazatlan would be complete without bartering with the vendors.  Last time, I got a pair of glasses for $6.  Well, I one-upped myself and snagged a pair for $5 this time. Actually, I can't take credit because it was my mom who was the stickler and got us the deal!  I actually tried to play cheap with another guy who kept bugging me to buy a dress.  I tried to get it for $10 originally, but he wasn't going for it and left.  My mom told me that he would be back to get the deal, and sure enough, he came back and kept holding up the dress towards me.  I offered him $10 again, but he got all offended and said, "NO LADY!" and walked away.  Fine! I didn't want it anyway!

We also rode in the little Volkwagen golfcart looking cars again.  Some of the drivers are seriously crazy and for the most part, you think you are going to die as they dart in front of oncoming traffic.  Our first driver kept honking at any girls he would see.  One time, there were two girls walking, he honked and then said to my dad, "one for you and one for me". It was HILARIOUS.

It was so fun to be able to relax and spend the day chilling with my parents - something we don't get to do that often!

Puerto Vallarta!

Puerto Vallarta was our first port.  We had talked about going swimming with the dolphins for months, but then when it came down to it, I wasn't so sure.  For one, the last time we went to Puerto Vallarta, we did a canopy adventure, so I hadn't really seen any of the port.  I was tempted to just stay behind, visit the beaches, etc and keep it low key.  It was also kind of expensive and since we had just gone to Disneyland, I was feeling a little bit frugal.  But Jordan insisted that I do it, so when we got off the ship, we were attacked by all of the taxi drivers.  Luckily, I knew how much my sisters paid when they went, so I told them I wouldn't pay more than that.  The taxi driver was SURE they wouldn't do it for that low, but decided to call anyway.  Sure enough, we got it for that price and were headed off!  

This was one of the first things that we saw... Pepe, the sealion.  He was just swimming in his tank, but next thing we knew, he was out, and we all got our pictures taken right next to him.  It was kind of scary, but kind of adventurous?  But mostly just scary.

Jordan didn't want to swim with the dolphins, and to be honest, I was ok with that.  He doesn't really like animals, so I didn't really want to waste the money if he wasn't going to enjoy it anyway! When we first got to the dolphin area, there were a ton of people.  I was kind of disappointed that I would have to share with all of these people, but turns out they were just getting in the water with the dolphins... and not actually swimming with them.  So there were only 5 in our group - 2 of which didn't speak any English.

Meeting the dolphin (her baby was also there, but we were told just to ignore the baby)...somewhere close to this point, the dolphin decided to flip on its back and poop... could have done without that part.

Doing tricks.  Apparently I was really entertained.

Those above two pictures are actually quite hideous, but they are the only two that I have... I sat on the boogie board and then the dolphin just came up behind and started pushing me with its nose!  So it was kind of a shock when something is pressing really hard on your foot and you are just gliding through the water.

This is where we put on some masks and watched the baby and mama swim underneath us.  So cute! And later resulted in the following hair do:

I'm sad that Jordan didn't get an actual picture of me kissing the dolphin.  It was also kind of scary and I was just afraid it was going to bite me or something.  But it didn't.  It was just a nice and cute dolphin.

Just dancing...

My camera died about half way through the dolphin swim, so I didn't get any pictures of the waterpark. Don't fret, I found some online.  I wish they had more parks like this in the US.  First of all, there were maybe 20 people at the waterpark and I am pretty sure they were all from the cruise.  It was nice to just walk right up to the waterslide and go down or swim in the lazy river and not see a soul.  There was one lifeguard that watched about 5 different slides and the steep yellow slide (see below) didn't even have a lifeguard.  Whatever, it's Mexico!  So the blue and yellow slide reminded me of a toilet bowl.  You go down the tube at approximately 357 miles an hour, shoot out and then spin around in the toilet bowl until you lose speed and end up falling down into that huge hole.  When I watched Jordan go down the slide, I might have peed a little... I was laughing SO hard.  Mostly because I was watching from the top and got to see his arms were flailing around as he fell upside down into the pool that was about 3 feet deep.  Ah, it was hilarious.  Here's a little youtube video of a similar slide (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TYcfwLw5PMY). Do yourself a favor and skip to 45 seconds.  And then when you are watching, please imagine Jordan on the slide, falling down the hole upside down and arms flailing.  And then imagine me at the top, laughing so hard I can't breathe and having to bend over to prevent myself from peeing my suit.

The slide itself wasn't even really that fun, but somehow I ended up going on it twice.  Since I was shot out of the tube so fast, the g forces are really strong and kept my head glued to the slide.  And then I was just spinning around, had no idea what is going on.  Meanwhile, the ridges from the slide (you know how they are on waterslides?) are scraping my back and next thing I knew, I was being dropped into a pool and could do NOTHING about it.

I think I went on this slide about 10 times.  It was pretty fun and the first time I went down it, I was convinced I was going to die.  We rode tubes down this slide and would catch a little air with every hill.  I was sure I was going to be flung off and go face first into the cement slide.  Did I mention it was made out of cement? So strange.

After swimming with the dolphins and playing at the waterpark for awhile, we were STARVING.  Our cab driver offered to take us to a really good burrito place.  However, they only had seafood burritos and I am not a huge seafood fan.  He took us to this place that was like completely authentic Mexico.  No one spoke a lick of English, so our driver had to order for us.  Jordan got a tasty Marlin burrito, but I was not going to order that.  So I walked off from the group and went down the street looking for something to eat.  As I mentioned, no one spoke English, I don't speak Spanish, so as you can imagine there is a bit of a language barrier.  There were about 4 restaurants within 100 yards, so I walked up to each one and asked,  "pollo"?  Finally, I found a place that they answered yes to pollo.  I had no idea what I had actually ordered, but I was assuming it was chicken something.  This place was 100% sketch with cats wandering around, the food didn't appear to be refrigerated, etc.  The food actually turned out to be pretty good (some fried chicken served with salsa and avocados), but each time I took a bite, I thought how I was going to get food poisoning and end up dead.  Jordan actually loved his Marlin burrito and somehow we not only survived, but none of us even got a little sick.

After we got back to the ship, I wasn't ready to get back on.  We still had about 4 hours before we had to do anything, so I convinced Jordan to come to the beach.  We sat in these chairs for about 30 minutes and then walked way down the beach. 

Next time I go to Puerto Vallarta, I vow to actually STAY in Puerto Vallarta and look around!  There are just too many fun things to do!